Room for Improvement

Today was a valuable pick-up art learning experience on a couple of fundamental levels.

I took a quick lunch, and ventured out to CVS to buy a loaf of bread. Immediately upon exiting the building, I started looking to satisfy the daily minimum. Thanks to the lovely women of Boston, it wasn't hard.

The first "potential" I laid eyes on was in front of me in line at CVS. Unfortunately for me (probably fortunate for her), there was a 6'4" finance-type wedged between us, and I'm not at the stage of the game where my confidence is such that I'll put my dignity on the line without an escape route and so many onlookers. So, she was off on the horizon by the time I'd made my purchase.

It was about then that I realized I don't have a phone (lost it last week), and so my ability to end an approach well was severely crippled. No matter, either I'm in this for keeps or not. The question had become, who was going to make me the weakest link today.

Pretty soon, I saw a cute blond speed walking my way through the lunchtime rush. Since I was on the other side of a cross walk from her, I had a moment to compose myself and commit. I'm going in. I loitered as she crossed the street, trying to look like I was figuring what direction to go, and as she passed I said:

"Excuse me. Can I talk to you for a second."

Me: "Do you read blogs?"

Her: [looking dumbfounded ... and you are???] "Sure. Sometimes."

Me: "Are you in a rush? I mean, do you have someplace to be?"

Her: "I'm going home to walk my dog, but not really."

Me: "So you can talk for a minute?"

Her: "Sure."

Me: "Right. So a buddy and I started a blog. We're each supposed to talk to one stranger, a woman [wow ... that sounded ackward], a day who catches our eye."

Her: [recognition dawning ... looking around for cameras and maybe the police] "Heh ... uh ... oh, that's really nice of you."

Me: "Because, we figure people are so up-tight in Boston or in a rush to get home an walk their dogs, and this is a good way to meet women. So, you're the most attractive girl I've seen out during my lunch, and I wanted to tell you."

Her: [smiling ... she brushes my arm a little with her hand and turns to go] "Ohhh. That's really sweet of you."

Me: [spaced] "See you." [creepy thing to say, Captain ... yikes, but I'm still alive]

So, lesson #1: Cute from afar might still be cute up close, but she wasn't my type, I don't think. It's important to close the distance before going in.

Lesson #2: Unless you plan on asking to write her # down, like in the olden days, it's best to have a phone so that you're not just some creepy perv with a blog---you're a creepy perv with a blog and a phone who deserves a good shoot-down.

Lesson #3: Try not to sound like you're selling something ... say, a blog, for example. The Spare Change Newspaper guy probably has a better "in".

Alright, all's quiet on this front ... turning it over to Smooth.